Friday, July 07, 2006

Still Waiting for that New Carrier


July 7, 2006-It is hot outside, and I am still waiting for that carrier to magically appear. Word has it that the Holland Tunnel is no longer safe. Well I knew that the Holland was NEVER safe--as I have discussed with my mommy many, many times, it gives me the creeps: long, dark, full of car exhaust, often you are stuck down there. Add the possibility of explosions, and death by a gigantic fireball followed by drowning in a huge tsunami of dirty, Hudson River water, and I'll be jumping outta that car so fast, you'll see hair flying.
Which reminds me--fireworks. The only good thing about going deaf, which I am, is that you don't hear most of the fireworks anymore, and it makes July 4 a whole lot more palatable. I used to stay at home, under the bed, trembling all day and night on July 4--the greatest day in our country's history my butt. Now I can proudly exit with my mom, and whomever she happens to have along, and enjoy the festivities.
"Enjoy" may be a bit of a stretch to describe it, since I can only say mayhem is mayhem, eh hem. Who wants to be parading around with a bunch of screaming kids in the dark? It's all the more chance to have my delicate paws stepped on.
But, sigh, I did get to walk three miles on July 4, not ride mind you, because I still am waiting for that anonymous donor to come along and give me, or make me from scratch, a nice doggie carrier.
Another weekend is approaching, and I know it's a cycling weekend to be sure. It befuddles me why we can't ride all over the place in this country. It used to be that you could walk anywhere, as long as you carried a machete to clear the underbush.
But now? If there is a road there, it is unlikely you can walk there unless you are in a car. No people on foot, no bikes, no animals, no nada, as my fellow perros say in Mexico.
It's completely unnatural if you ask me.
Think about it. You can't go to the following places if you walk or ride your bike: (1) every single interstate highway in the United States; (2) most big bridges and tunnels in the U.S.; (3) most highways and parkways in the U.S.; (4) many streets in the U.S. because it's not safe; (5) you add the category here, because I am sure I am missing a few.
Aside from the fact that I have to wear a leash wherever I go, this kind of feels like prison. Not to mention that the real reason I have to wear a leash all the time is so I don't get run over.
In essence, America is doggist.
There are no rights for dogs here, and we don't have equal access.
And if you think I am happy about that, think again. As soon as I learn how to speak English (writing it is not enough), I'll be starting my own dog rights organization.

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